Oneshots of cobblebats and twobats
by notamasochist
Summary: Like the title says. These one shots are based off of telltale batman.
1. Cobblebats: Coming out

"Ay, Bruce, I think I want to tell my mom I'm bi." A teenage Oswald Cobblepot said in a monotone. Him and Bruce were laying in Oz's bed, staring at the star lights on the ceiling. Bruce sat up as Oz pulled out a cigarette from his pocket. "Oz...I don't know what to say, that's a pretty big deal-" "And I want you to be there." Oswald cut him off and put the lit cigarette to his lips. "Oh, ah, of course, Oz. I'm flattered that you want me there." Bruce awkwardly smiled. The taller teen made circles with the smoke. "That's good." Oz smiled a wide, shit eating smile. "It's kinda cold in here. Wanna cuddle?" He asked after turning to face the other, their noses almost touching. "Sure thing, Oz." Bruce smiled back. Oz laughed and flipped back around, his back to the other. He put out his unfinished cigarette in his homemade ashtray. Bruce wrapped his arms around Oz's slender waist, holding him close. The two boys fell asleep.

Oz woke up to the feel of his mom's stare. She was standing in the doorway, laundry basket in hand. "Oh, did I wake you? I was just picking up your dirty clothes but I couldn't help but notice how cute my little penguin was asleep." She teased. Oz blushed a little as he shifted upward. Bruce's arms were clinging to his lower waist now, practically in his lap. "Do you think Bruce would want his clothes washed? I know we don't have fancy washing stuff but it should get the job done." "It'll be ight mom, but..." Oz shook his friend awake. Bruce's eyes shot open with a confused look. "I need to tell you something." Oz stated. This made his mom raise an eyebrow. "Wait, you're going to-" Oswald again cut Bruce off. "I'm bisexual." His mom gave him a confused look. Bruce started to let go of Oz, but Oz grabbed his friend's arms and kept Bruce in place. Panic filled Bruce's face. "I like boys and girls." Oz stated. "And?" Mrs. Cobblepot asked.

"And what?" Oz asked. "Is that all? Ozzie, you have me worried for a second." His mother laughed and left the room.


	2. Cobblebats: Bruce's sweet sixteen

Today is Bruce Wayne's birthday. Today he is turning sixteen and his mother threw a huge party for him. Everyone who's anyone in Gotham came. The whole thing stressed Bruce out, he low key hated this type of thing. He hated the fake smiles he had to put on during it. Bruce was happy his friend, Oswald was there. He might not have made it through the night without him.

The night was hectic and long but Bruce was so happy when his mom told him that "Oswald and you can go change out of your dress clothes and relax. Alfred and I will see the guests out." It was the first real smile the teen had made all night. He had almost forgot that Oz was spending the night.

Bruce changed out of his tux and into a black tanktop and fluffy yellow pajama pants. Oz was waiting outside Bruce's room for him. The birthday boy had to stifle a laugh when he saw Oz. He was wearing a penguin onesie and leaning on the wall like Jack from titanic asked to paint him. "You like pretty boy?" Oz teased and made a kissing noise.

"Come on, let's get some cake. My mother didn't let me have any in my other penguin suit." The taller teen walked in the direction of the Wayne's kitchen. "Sure, I didn't get enough cake either. I don't like eating in front of that many people." Bruce lightly smiled. The two snuck into the kitchen. Oswald pulls out a small cake out of the fridge and cuts a piece for himself. The rest he puts in front of Bruce. The birthday boy wiped some icing onto his finger and onto the other teen's nose. "Boop!" Bruce smiled and laughed. He caught Oz off guard. Oswald stood there, processing what just happened.

The tall teen unzipped his onesie half way and tried the upper half in a way it would stay on his he slammed Bruce's face into the cake and laughed. "Boop!" He yelled through his laughter. Bruce slowly pulled his face up. It was covered in yellow buttercream icing and vanilla cake. "Brucie, you got just a little something on your face." "Oswald, holy...MMMM...moley." Bruce was stunned, well Oz always did jump to extremes.

"Well, what are you going to do about it, pretty boy?" Oswald smirked. Without answering Bruce grabbed a chunk of cake at Oz and it hit his chest. The cake fight was on. Well, it was on until a little boy opened the kitchen door. It was one of the guests sons. Bruce had forgotten who.

"Hey, uh, you're parents are probably looking for you in the front room." Bruce stated. "I want some cake." The little boy said in a bratty tone. Oswald looked as if he struck gold. "Heyo, kid. What do you think about adults kissing?" "Eww, it's gross."

Oswald smirked again and whispered in Bruce's ear. "I know how to make this kid leave, so we can clean before your mom finds us. I'm going to kiss you and that'll make him leave." "What if it doesn't work? That means you kissed me for no reason." Bruce whispered back. "Would that be such a bad thing, Cake face?" Oz asked half-joking. "Heh, I guess not, bird brain." and with that Oz pulled Bruce in for a kiss. A kiss on his cake covered lips.

The plan worked the boy left as soon as he saw what was happening. The kiss was soft and light and pulled away but not before licking some icing off Bruce's cheek. "Alright, enough bullshit. Let's clean up before your mom bans you from seeing me."


	3. AU where Bruce died in the alley

"I knew I'd find you here, Master Oswald." The butler stared down at the man getting drunk in crime alley. The just angrily stared back and took another swig out of the bottle in his hand. "You always come here or your father's park, when you get in a mood." The man looked away from the other. His empty hand touching the metal plate on the ground, 'In memory of Bruce Wayne. Gotham's fallen son.'

Oswald laughed a joyless laugh, "There's one more place I go, Alfred." The butler raised a eyebrow, "Where sir?" Oswald smiled that shit eating smile of his. "Thomas Wayne's grave, to piss on it." More joyless laughter. "Oswald, Ms. Martha and I wanted to stop Thomas-" "Wanting and trying are two very different things, mate."

Another drink. "Maybe if you'd tried instead of wanting, my mum wouldn't be in Arkham," Oswald staggered to his feet." maybe my father wouldn't have killed himself." His fingers tighten around the bottle so hard they were white. "Maybe a innocent boy named Bruce Wayne wouldn't be dead!" Oswald's voice was like venom.

He threw the bottle at the alleys back wall, glass and boze went everywhere. Alfred went tight lipped. Oz's breath became heavy. "We were going to be kings, the both of us. Me and him would have ruled this city!" Oswald ranted and slurred. Alfred sighed, "You're right….. Not a day goes by where I don't think about it." The older man shook his head. "I'm not going to drag you home. Just, be careful and come home at a reasonable hour. Ms. Martha worries." Alfred sighed and turned around to leave.

"I feel nothing but contempt for him, you know? Tch, who knows? Maybe if Thomas had lived, maybe I would have been the the one to bump him off." More joyless laughter escaped Oswald's mouth as his hand tighten around his scar ridden wrist.


	4. Twobats: What should have happened

"You know what Selina, I'm about done with your crap. I made a mistake choosing you over him. It's one I don't intend to repeat. I might not be able to by myself, help Harvey, but I can buy someone who can. I'm going after him and you can't stop me." Bruce ran out into the hallway without waiting for a reply. "Harv, wait!"

Harvey's response was to walk faster. The shorter man had to practically run to catch up with the other. Bruce grabbed Harvey's arm. "Harvey, please, let me explain what happened and afterwards we'll talk about how I can help you." Bruce pleaded. Harvey turned around and Bruce was greeted with watering eyes filled of emotion. "...Bruce,I-" He was cut off by the sound of someone turning a doorknob and Mr. Wayne pulling him into a room marked out of service.

"Sorry, it would be hard to explain the headlines, 'A naked Bruce Wayne corners an emotional Mayor Dent.' " The raven haired man lightly smiled. "Don't worry, I'm going to call Alfred right now to come get us." One short call through bluetooth thing later.

Harvey Dent sat down on the floor of the broken ice room, while Bruce explained that, "Last night, Selina and I, met to talk about you. We were interrupted by The Children of Arkham, I got injured." Bruce gestured to the bandage on his waist. Harvey eyes widen for a second then stared intently at the bandage. A flash of anger went across his face. "Her place was nearby and we didn't want to cause a scene, so she took me there and patched me up. That's all that happened."

The taller man stood up and stared the other down. " You better not be lying to me, Brucie." He was speaking with that rough voice again. "Harvey, You are my best and only friend. I would be a fool to.." Bruce paused. "Betray you." Moments of silence passed by, that felt like years.

"Damn it!" Dent left a dent in the ice machine's lid. "The Children of Arkham must pay!" He growled. "They will, Harv. We will make sure they see justice, but we need to make you're alright first. I know this scandal is bad and it's bad your image but you don't need to be alone right now." Bruce stated. Harvey sighed, shaking his head. "I know, god, I know." After a few minutes Alfred came with some clothes for Bruce. "Please, get my stuff from Ms. Kyle." "Of course, sir." and with that Bruce lend Harvey to his car.


	5. Cobblebats: Valentine's day

Oswald fiddled with his tie as he waited for someone to open the door. He was standing outside of his partner, Bruce Wayne's house. They have been dating for about five months. Even though they went through the holiday months, this Valentine's day is the first holiday they're spending together as adults.

At Oz's feet was a bag filled with gifts for his boyfriend. He hoped they would be good enough for a billionaire. What do you get a man who has anything?

Alfred opened the door. "He's been expecting you, Cobblepot. Please, follow me." Oswald smiled, picked up the bag, and trailed after him.

"Alright, old man." Oswald said in a teasing tone. The butler led him to the dining room, which wasn't a big surprise since Bruce and Oswald were supposed to have dinner. What was a surprise was what was on the table.

Cadbury creme eggs spelt out 'I LOVE YOU OZ!' and behind that was giant stuffed animal penguin, in it's beak was a white rose and between its feet was a mountain of creme eggs. "Happy Valentine's day, Oz." Bruce smiled at Oswald waiting to see his reaction.

The bag dropped out of Oz's hand. "You asshole! It's perfect as everything usually is with you. You couldn't let me have this could you? It makes my gifts seem like shite." Oswald huffed and puffed, stamping his foot.

Bruce shook his head. "Oswald, I'm sure your gifts are fine. Please, show me what you got me." There was amusement on his face. The billionaire was used to the other's tantrums.

"OH, nothing much." Oswald bent over the bag. "A grey turtleneck, so you wouldn't be cold." He threw it over his shoulder at Bruce. "A punny card, some shitty homemade biscuits and…" Oz threw as he named them off. He rustled around in the bag. "Some fucking glittery good smelling hand sanitizer, because I thought it would be funny to see you walk around with glittery hands." Oswald turned to face Bruce to see he managed to catch them all. "See, it's shite like this. Pretty boy, you need to stop being so bloody perfect." He pointed to make his point across.

Bruce sighed blissfully as he sat Oz's gifts on the table. "I like the color of sweater, dark gray. That's thoughtful, it's nice to know you worry about me getting cold. " He teased. "I'm sure your cookies taste great." The billionaire opened the container and took a cookie. Mm, snickerdoodle. Bruce smiled as he chewed. "They're good, Oz."

Oswald marched over there and grabbed Bruce Wayne by the tie. "You better not be shitting me, mate."

Bruce smiled and looked into Oswald's green eyes. "I'm not. These cookies are good. They remind me of childhood."

The thinner man blushed, jerked his head away, and fixed the other's tie back into place. "Good. Whatever, just don't eat too many. You'll spoil your dinner." Oswald huffed. "Speaking of dinner, what are we eating?"

"You'll see." Bruce teased. "Alfred, can you clear the table and bring dinner out?" He called out.

"Of course, sir." Alfred nodded and began putting all the creme eggs into a bowl.

"Wait, can-can the penguin stay?" Oswald asked, slightly embarrassed but totally serious.

Alfred couldn't help but give him, a 'WTF' look. Bruce laughed to himself. "Sure, Oz. Whatever you want."

"Does he need a plate too, sir?" The butler asked.

"No, don't tease me, old man." Oswald snapped.

Alfred shook his head and left. Bruce helped Oz sit the giant penguin in a chair. "Bloody hell, how big is he, Wayne?" Oswald asked, ecstatic.

"I believe the website said five feet." The billionaire said uncertainly.

The thinner man patted the stuffed animal's belly. "He's a big boy." Oz said with a wide grin on his face. While his boyfriend was fawning over the plushie, Bruce pulled out a chair for him next to it and seated himself across from them.

Oswald finally sat down when Alfred came back into the room carrying food. Tonight's dinner was baked salmon with a sweet glaze and salad. The butler placed plates in front of the two men. He then pour them glasses of Chardonnay wine.

"How about a toast to us?" Bruce asked as he held up his glass. Oswald held up his own glass.

"To not being apart again." Bruce said.

"To being kings." Oswald replied.

Dinner was delicious. Oswald asked for seconds on food and triples on wine. "So, what's next, Wayne?" Oswald asked as his boyfriend led him somewhere. It was one of the mansion's movie theaters. This one was filled with couches instead of normal seats.

"How about a movie?" Bruce suggested as Oswald shifted his weight to get a better grip on his stuffed penguin.

"Watching a movies in suits, Wayne? I'm extra but that's a little much even for me." Oz shook his head.

"You're right. That's why I got you…" Bruce's voice trailed off as he searched the couch in front of him for something. Oswald sat the plushie down.

"Wayne, stop." Oz started pushing up his sleeves. "Wayne, I'm going to fight you."

Bruce found what he was looking for, it was a gift box. He smiled.

"Wayne, I'm serious." Oswald stated as he was handed the box. Inside the gift box was a penguin onesie. "Wayne, after I change into this, I'm kicking your ass." Oswald stated before he left the room to change. When he came back, Bruce was wearing the gray turtle neck, that Oswald got him and sweatpants.

"How do I look?" The billionaire modeled, arms wide open, for his boyfriend. The response was a tackle hug from him.

Oswald huffed. "You're lucky you're pretty."

Bruce laughed. "What movie do you wanna watch?"

"I don't know, you're the one planning this remember?" Oz's voice was light.

"Okay,okay." The billionaire pushed his boyfriend away. " You go choose a seat with the plushie and I'll go put in a movie." Oswald nodded and did such.

When Bruce came back, Oswald was standing with his plushie in front of a couch. "I want you to sit down first." Oz commanded. Bruce shook his head but obeyed. The thinner man sat in the other's lap and in his own sat the plushie.

"Oz, I can't see the movie with your plushie." Bruce's voice was light.

"You should thought about that when you bought me a five foot tall penguin plushie." He teased.

Bruce smirked and pulled off Oz's onesie's hood. The billionaire's lips were planted on the other's neck and an arm was wrapped around his waist. "God, I love you, Oswald."

Oswald wiggled, squeaked and mumbled as kept kissing his neck. "I said I loved you, Oswald." Bruce spoke loudly, his breath on Oz's neck. The billionaire could feel his boyfriend turning red. "Oswald Cobblepot, when someone says that they love you, you're supposed to say it back." He jokingly scolded.

"Bruce, I…." Oswald paused. Bruce mouth stopped on his neck. "Yes?" "I hold deep affection for you." The billionaire shrugged. "Close enough. I hold deep affection for you too, Oz."

"Oi, pretty boy, can you stop kissing my neck. I'm trying watch something here." Oswald yelled.

"Well, I need something to do since I can't watch the movie." Bruce stated.

"Fine." He huffed. Oz got up and reseed himself. He cuddled into Bruce's side, the plushie was on top of his feet. "Happy?"

"Very." The billionaire leaned down and kissed the other's forehead. He wrapped his arm around his partner's shoulder. Oswald held his hand.

Neither of them payed much attention to the movie.


End file.
